Dear Jerry,
Jerry-
It's been a while man and I miss you. I feel like I shouldn't intrude too much into your new life. I only text you when I'm texted first, which is honestly never. I still consider you a good friend. a close friend. as much as I hate to admit it, I don't think I'll ever get over you. No matter how many guys I am friends with to fill your void. No matter how many dates I go on. No matter how far away from you I try to me, I am still in love with you. Not immediately on the surface, but if you dig a little deeper- it's there.
Let me congratulate you on the one year anniversary with the girl you chose over me.
Wow one year. I wasn't in France for a month before you pounced on her. I was still getting over jetlag when you asked her to be your girlfriend. With events like these coming to light, how do you think that makes me feel? Absolutely worthless. I was this toy/game/girl you thought you trick into liking you... the minute I ask for answers about our relationship and leave the country to pursue my dream you attack on this girl.
Let me tell you something. I may love you, but you are a fool.
This girl has nothing to offer you.
I knew her before you did and she is not the girl I believe she portrays herself as.
She is immature.
She has a pretty useless major and an even worse GPA.
What does she do now that she's out of school? I think she lives at home, correct me if I'm wrong.
Jerry. Later on and it may be years from now you will regret this decision. The decision that drove me to tears for days and these tears still (a year later) come and go. The decision that drove me into another man's arms (even if it was just for a little bit). The decision that ultimately helped me to find the courage to pursue my dream. Yes Jerry, you are the reason I want to go to grad school abroad. You literally drove me out of the country. I want to prove to you, to me and to everyone else that I am worthy-I am intelligent- I am great- and I will always be better than this girl you replaced me with. I must get as far away from you as possible. It is ultimately the best for both of us and I think you know that too.
It's been a while man and I miss you. I feel like I shouldn't intrude too much into your new life. I only text you when I'm texted first, which is honestly never. I still consider you a good friend. a close friend. as much as I hate to admit it, I don't think I'll ever get over you. No matter how many guys I am friends with to fill your void. No matter how many dates I go on. No matter how far away from you I try to me, I am still in love with you. Not immediately on the surface, but if you dig a little deeper- it's there.
Let me congratulate you on the one year anniversary with the girl you chose over me.
Wow one year. I wasn't in France for a month before you pounced on her. I was still getting over jetlag when you asked her to be your girlfriend. With events like these coming to light, how do you think that makes me feel? Absolutely worthless. I was this toy/game/girl you thought you trick into liking you... the minute I ask for answers about our relationship and leave the country to pursue my dream you attack on this girl.
Let me tell you something. I may love you, but you are a fool.
This girl has nothing to offer you.
I knew her before you did and she is not the girl I believe she portrays herself as.
She is immature.
She has a pretty useless major and an even worse GPA.
What does she do now that she's out of school? I think she lives at home, correct me if I'm wrong.
Jerry. Later on and it may be years from now you will regret this decision. The decision that drove me to tears for days and these tears still (a year later) come and go. The decision that drove me into another man's arms (even if it was just for a little bit). The decision that ultimately helped me to find the courage to pursue my dream. Yes Jerry, you are the reason I want to go to grad school abroad. You literally drove me out of the country. I want to prove to you, to me and to everyone else that I am worthy-I am intelligent- I am great- and I will always be better than this girl you replaced me with. I must get as far away from you as possible. It is ultimately the best for both of us and I think you know that too.
I have come to think that you never loved me,
however I can't stop loving you.
Always yours,
Elaine
Hey, Girl! I wanted to share this because I've literally felt what you're describing (See here: http://girlofgreengables.com/why-your-ex-moved-on-so-quickly-and-what-you-can-do-about-it/) and I promise, those feelings will eventually shift and change to where you won't feel in love with him anymore. Why spend time or energy on someone who didn't recognize how incredible you were when he had you?
ReplyDeleteI hope your heart heals swiftly. <3 XOXO
Thank you very much for your kind words and wisdom. It has been a tough road, but like you said--- slowly it is getting better and brighter. You are sweet.
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